Wednesday, October 1, 2008
State of the Me
Firstly, I've got the plague again, even worse than last time. I'm feeling better today, but for the last few days I've felt like death. The worst part is not being able to rely on my precious DayQuil to fix me. My OB says Tylenol and allergy pills, but the 24-hour Claritin I had wasn't making a dent. Mr. Fantastic took my miserable self to the grocery store where we spent like $50 on cold remedies and Halloween candy, both of which made me feel immensely better. The doctor suggested I try Benadryl or Sudafed instead of the Claritin, so we got both, but so far I have only tried the Benadryl. I must bow before the altar of Benadryl, for it hath ended my misery. Thank goodness! I haven't taken it since I was a kid, because it used to make me super hyper. Now, it puts me right to sleep and dried up all my sneezy sniffles. Ahhh.
Even though the plague is under control, we still have a lot going on. With Peanut on the way, we've decided to sell our one-bedroom condo and buy a house. Yikes, in this market?! I know. But we don't have room in our place for us, let alone a baby. Technically, we'd prolly have room for the actual baby, just not for all the associated crap that comes with a baby. Anyway, so the realtor came over last week to check out our place and basically told us that half our stuff had to go. So this weekend, despite the plague and general feelings of avoidance, Mr. F and I rented a storage unit and packed away a whole bunch of stuff. It was a very daunting task which mostly involved heavy lifting on Mr. F's part and the filling of boxes on mine. Plus both of our brothers came to help with the lifting and driving portion, so it went pretty quickly.
We have crazy storage space here – awesome closets which, over the course of 6+ years, I have been able to cram full of an amazing amount of crap. It was kind of cleansing going through and tossing stuff or putting things in the goodwill pile. Plus, now my closets look unbelievably organized and actually as if they will hold more than I already know they do. Huh. I would've thought it would be a bonus for buyers to see just how much crap you can fit into a closet, but apparently not.
Our place, now devoid of all "personal" touches such as photographs and tchotchkes and literally half our furniture, looks like a hotel. Well, a very messy hotel, anyway, until I get around to straightening up and arranging what's left of our stuff. Once the place is all spiffed up, our realtor will come back and take pictures and such and get us on the market.
It's kind of sad, really, but I guess not having too much stuff or anything personal is what helps potential buyers imagine themselves living in your home. I don't want to leave here but there's just no way we can stay. *sad face* Still, I am really looking forward to a new house and preparing for this next step in our lives. I hope someone sees our place and falls just as much in love with it as we did. And then wants to give us lots of money for the privilege of living here.
The scary part of this whole moving house thing is that we can't buy a place until we sell ours. Which means once we get a contract on our place, we have like three days to pack the rest of our stuff and move out, as well as look for and buy a new place of our own. Yikes, again. I suppose if we had to, we can put the rest of our stuff in storage and live in a hotel for a week or whatever until we find a house we love. Daunting prospect, regardless!
So, along with the plague and the moving house thing…Mr. Fantastic has changed jobs. He hated his old job, has done for a long time and basically was dreading going in to the office every day. It was draining all the life and happiness from him. Even though it's not exactly the best time for it, he left. The good news is that he got a contract for two to three weeks with his brother-in-law's company. It's great money for such a short period, and it's doing something completely different which will be a good change for him.
The bad news is the job is in Nebraska. He left this morning. He was very wary of leaving me for such a long period of time, and truthfully, I'm not thrilled to have him gone, but we decided it was the best thing for us to do right now. I'm fine and there's no reason for him to worry about me or the baby, although that's not going to actually stop him worrying. Mostly, I think we'll just miss each other a whole bunch. I already feel kind of lonely in my half-empty house that's now empty of him, too.
We're not entirely sure how we're going to manage this whole packing up and moving and whatnot with him being gone, but we'll make it work. He keeps reminding me not to lift anything heavy, but it's mostly toasters and lamps and pillows and such now, so I'm not worried about that. And we still have to think about what Mr. F will be doing when he gets back in a few weeks, but I'm sure we'll figure something out.
Anyway, I've got a lot on my mind. Monday was a bad day – I was feeling so dreadful and thinking about all the things happening and had a few spontaneous bouts of weepiness that I know made Mr. F feel awful too. Now that I'm not feeling so sick, things don't seem as overwhelming but it's still a lot to have going on all at once. I know everything will be fine but phew, some days it feels like too much.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Pants pants pants! Or, Peanut update.

The baby hasn't started moving yet and you have no outwardly visible "baby bump," you no longer feel sick or exhausted, and in my case, your pox-ridden skin clears up. Although my boobs no longer hurt, they are still the size of Alaska, which for a few weeks has literally been the only thing reminding me that I am actually growing a human being somewhere in here. It has been the most bizarre thing and has made me question my sanity.
Most of my conversations with Peanut recently have been one-sided and very much like this:
Me: Yoo hoo...anybody at home in there? *poke*
Peanut: [silence]
Me: Hellooooo... *pokepokepopke*
Peanut: [silence]
Me: I know you're in there! It was like, just two weeks ago you were making me eat Cheetos. You can't have gone anywhere. There's nowhere for you to go. I would have noticed.
Peanut: [silence]
Me: Sigh. *pokes morosely*
Peanut: [In my imagination] Leave me alone, lady! I'm growing bones in here!
Thank goodness for my pregger peeps (my girls who are pregnant or have had kids and are sagaciously helping me keep my sanity) who have kept reminding me that it won't be long until I'm feeling Peanut move and am looking pregnant. They have also wisely reminded me that I should be prepared to one day just "pop" - meaning that I will blithely go about with my trousers unbuttoned lamenting the fact that I am never actually going to "seem" pregnant and then the next day there will suddenly be a BABY in there and no amount of pants unzipping will make me comfortable. This happened yesterday.
Mr. F and I went to pub quiz with his mom, brother and sister last night and as I got dressed, I noticed my jeans felt a bit tighter than I'm used to. I zipped them up and left them unbuttoned as per usual and put on my bella band but when I looked in the mirror, I noticed a marked difference from the day before - there was quite obviously a bump there where there had just been my flabby tummy previously. And it just got more noticeable through the evening. I was really uncomfortable, both my belly and my back - I couldn't get comfortable sitting and had to pee a billion times, and eventually ended up with the pants all the way unzipped (thank goodness for the bella band!). I took a couple of pictures when we got home. Proof that I have not imagined wee Peanut!
And despite repeated warnings from multiple people that I should have some maternity pants on hand well before I actually needed them, I did not, so Mr. Fantastic had to take me pants shopping today. I am now the proud owner of one new pair of maternity jeans from Target, which are super cute but also weren't cheap and so I will be hitting up friends and family for hand-me-downs.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Open letters to Recent Television
Spoilers for recent episodes of things, so don't read if you don't want to know.
Dear Heroes: Yeah, you were losing me at the end of last year. Sars already broke up with you and I don't blame her. The new episode(s) didn't really do a lot to reel me back in. Where did Molly go? Please tell me Nathan is not going to stay a God-squadder. And the business with Claire? Not on. How could you let Sylar become unkillable? (By the way, can anybody explain what exactly Sylar did with whatever thing he pulled from Claire's brain?) Also, was Mama Petrelli's "Luke, I am your father" moment metaphorical or…seriously, Sylar's her son? Wha? And don't even get me started on the replicator currently inhabiting Mohinder's body. You are officially on notice.
Dear Sarah Connor Chronicles: Same to you, pal. You started losing me at the end of last year, too. You're also on notice, although you're much further down the shit list than Heroes. I'm glad you made John get a haircut, though. And this business with Cameron is interesting, so I'm willing to stick around for a while longer yet. Maybe you'll grow back on me.
Dear Fringe: I tried. I really, really did. If you maybe had more Pacey and his kooky dad and less annoying blonde, I could've stuck it out. Also, fewer disgusting special effects wouldn't have hurt. Don't feel bad - this isn't really a break up; we were never really together in the first place.
Dear House: Welcome back, darling! Oh, how I've missed you. Wilson breaking up with you just made you more interesting. Besides, you know it won't stick. Foreman, you rock. So do you, private investigator guy. I do have to ask about tonight's episode, are organ donor recipients allowed to do shit like Mixed Martial Arts? I always thought you sorta had to take it easy on yourself, even five years later. Anyway, kisses! See you next week.
Dear Biggest Loser, World Series of Poker, Eureka, Whatever, Martha!, Dancing with the Stars, Project Runway and America's Next Top Model: Kisses! Love you. ♥
Peanut update
We're in week 19 and so far I'm doing great. Feeling pretty good for the most part. Have noticed a definite increase in hunger, which is great since I'm still down about 5 pounds from pre-pregnancy. I've also started feeling round ligament pain, usually right when I stand up. It's a sharp stabbing pain in my groin that goes away in a second or two and means my ligaments and bones and such are all stretching and whatnot. Also been having ocassional low back pain but that's easily helped with a heating pad.
Something interesting I learned this week: During pregnancy, your body produces a hormone called Relaxin, which causes your muscles and ligaments to loosen up and stretch out. Although it's mainly to help the abdomen and pelvis accomodate the growing baby, it affects your whole body and is the reason many pregnant women get clumsy as they progress. It's also the reason why your feet get bigger, and if you don't wear form-fitting shoes during your pregnancy (many preggers live in flip-flops), your feet can stay permanently stretched out post-partum. (Note to self: keep wearing tennis shoes!)
I still feel cold all the time, although Mr. F says my skin is hot a lot of the time. The other day I went out in 85 degree weather in jeans and a sweater and felt fine! Let's see, my skin's finally back in good shape - in fact on Friday at work, one of the girls told me how great my skin looked - and she didn't know I was pregnant!
Speaking of which, it feels weird that I'm almost 5 months pregnant and you still really cannot tell when I'm wearing clothes. My pants are definitely getting tight - I don't wear any of my pants fastened now, thank goodness for the bella band. Mr. F & I can both feel my lower belly is definitely firmer and swelling a bit, but otherwise, that's really the only outward sign. I was moaning about it the other day to H3, basically that you really can't see that I'm pregnant and I'm not really feeling the baby move yet and she said her doctor told her when she was this many weeks that this is the "boring time" of pregnancy. It's true! I'm just waiting for things to happen. I should just stop being antsy and enjoy feeling so good right now.
So, I'm not sure if I've felt the baby move yet. The doctor told me not to expect it before 20 weeks, and I don't really know what I'm supposed to be feeling, so I'm not sure. But I have been feeling something almost like bubbles bursting or like a little twitch in my abdomen, so maybe that's it. One of my books said the baby is reactive to light now and that if I were to shine a flashlight against my tummy, the baby would most likely flinch away from it. I've been tempted to see if I can get the baby to move by doing that but Mr. F says it's mean and I should just be patient. Sigh.
Last week Peanut weighed about 5 ounces and was about 5.5 inches long, which by the way, is measured "crown to rump" and so doesn't include the legs. He or she also learned how to yawn last week and the nervous system came online. This week Peanut is 6 inches and 8 ounces, about the size of a large mango. (What is it with the fruit comparisons?) Also this week, cartilage throughout the body is turning into bone.
I love the picture the website has given me of what the baby looks like this week. Apparently, the kid's a yoga master. Heh.
Anxious for my next appointment on 10/8, where we will hopefully be finding out if it's a boy Peanut or a girl Peanut!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Whatever, Martha
In the first episode I watched, there's a clip where Martha's guest is a guy who has a vast and varied twine collection from all over the world. The guy is really into his twine and Alexis kind of gets it, can see where the spools of twine are beautiful and stuff. But Jennifer just keeps saying, "HE COLLECTS STRING."
And in the episode I'm watching now, there's a creepy looking dude named Peanut Butter (no, seriously!) who claims to be a clown, although he looks like no clown I've ever seen. The closest he comes is maybe a second-rate Cirque du Soleil type clown, but mostly he looks like Jambi in a pink skirt.
Anyway, two thumbs up from me.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Oh! That's your uterus!
Dr. F: (on my upper belly) *pokepokepoke*
Me: ...
Dr. F: (on my lower belly) *pokepokepoke* Hmm. *poke...poke...poke*
Me: ...
Dr. F: Hmm! *prod...prod...prod* Oh!
Me: *raised eyebrow*
Dr. F: (delightedly, poking some more at my lower belly) I was going to ask you if you're consitpated...but that's your uterus!
Me: LOL!
Dr. F: (abashed) Sorry...I don't see many pregnant women.
He was so excited to feel my uterus, it was adorable. I'm supposed to go see him again in three months and I'm looking forward to it because he was so charming.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
All's well in PeanutLand
Had my 4-month baby visit today and got to meet my new OB, Dr. Owens. She's really great, and I'll be sticking with her for the next few months until the last trimester, then I'll rotate through the rest of the docs so I can meet them all.
Pretty routine today, talked for a while so she could get to know me and my history. Listened to the heartbeat - always goofily exciting. Plus there was all this background noise which Dr. O said was the baby moving and kicking. I can't believe there's something that big in there that I can't even feel! She said not to get too impatient because most first time moms won't feel anything until 20 weeks.
They also took some blood and are doing something called an AFP test which is routine and checks for defects. I think they told me we'd have results in like 48 hours. Am scheduled for my anataomy scan next time at the 20 week visit, which is when they look at all the parts and hopefully tell us if it's a boy or a girl, as long as Peanut is cooperating.
Dr. O also said it was okay for us to use our heated mattress pad when it gets colder, thank goodness. I was worried about that because one of my books (my least favorite and most alarming) said I should never use a heating pad or electric blanket, take a hot bath or use a hot tub. So far only the hot tub is verboten. Anyway, the doctor chuckled when I asked, saying, "Yeah, sometimes the books can be a little..." and she did this head waggle eye-rolly thing to indicate the panic-inducing, apocalyptic tone of voice some of the books take in instructing you what not to do.
So this one book I have has a section each week called HOW YOUR ACTIONS AFFECT THE BABY. And basically it tells you that every little thing you do (or do not do) can cause untold catastrophic harm to your little one. The dire warnings about everything are very disconcerting and make you worriedly think back over the past month about what you ate and did and how you slept and everything and wonder if you were doing it wrong. Oy. Also, there are warnings in practically every chapter about how my alcohol use/recreational drug use/promiscuity is BAD FOR THE BABY and I really ought to consider quitting. Last chapter was almost entirely dedicated to how to get myself out of a domestic violence situation. I mean, these are all good things to know, but I am clearly not the demographic this book was aimed at. How about you tell me to take a prenatal yoga class or get a massage or something?
My cousin has the same book, only an earlier edition. She called me a couple months ago freaked out because of the ominous section saying sleeping on your back would deprive the baby of all the vital things it needs, such as blood supply. H3 is a back sleeper and was having trouble transitioning to side sleeping and when she went to check the book became suitably alarmed. She had me check my later edition of the book which had the same dire warning against back sleeping verbatim. Right then I decided to take this book with a grain of salt and appreciate it for the excellent pictures of WHAT YOUR BABY LOOKS LIKE THIS WEEK and use my copy of What to Expect for real answers to stuff.
This week Peanut has fingernails, toenails, fingerprints and footprints. Sizewise, he's about five inches long and more than three and a half ounces, about the size of my open hand. I still can't believe there's something that big in there and I can't even tell. I'm really not looking pregnant yet, although my lower belly is getting firmer and some pants are feeling a little tight. Also, my boobs are the size of Alaska but at least they stopped hurting. Skin seems to be pretty much cleared up except for the ocassional spot, and I'm in general feeling pretty good.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Health update
However, we had a nice chat and basically he told me besides doing a bunch of tests which he didn't want to do because of the baby, he would prescribe for me the same medicines they gave me in the ER (Protonix and Sucralfate) and that he wants me to come back in three months or if things change.
The good news is that he's pretty sure what happened both in August and in late February is that it was a gall bladder issue - that I either passed a small stone or what they call "sludge" which is basically the precursor to a stone. These kinds of gall bladder problems are common in people who have lost a significant amount of weight and also with pregnancy. So, not really a surprise but I'm glad somebody had an actual definite opinion on what the problem is as opposed to everybody saying there was no discernible cause. The bad news is there is basically nothing I can do about it to prevent it happening again. Really the only thing I could do is diet related but I'm already doing all the things I'm supposed to, so he told me to keep on like I have been. Let's all keep our fingers crossed that it doesn't happen again so I can continue my Zen relationship with food.
Have an OB appointment on Wednesday, so we'll have a Peanut update then.
ALSO, I am watching John and Kate Plus 8...they're camping out in the backyard. Now I want a S'more. A real, live S'more made over a campfire. Yum. Is there a way I could conceivably make them in my kitchen? If only I had a gas stove, I'd totally roast me a marshmellow.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Cheesy Poofs are Awesome
By the way, I quite possibly felt some movement yesterday! The books tell me I likely won't realize it when I first feel it because I'll probably think it's gas. They describe it as possibly feeling like a bubble bursting, which is what this felt like, but you know...could've just been gas. Anyway, possible yay?
Hey, another yay me - I got a $250 bonus from work today for my hard work on a very long, very huge project that wrapped up this week. Cool! And always nice to get a pat on the back like that.
Are you watching Project Runway? I adore this show and have a raging serious platonic crush on Tim Gunn and his giant vocabulary even though I don't have much interest in fashion. I've been reading the recaps at the Advocate and highly recommend them.