What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage

Things are looking up! Or, 69 days left.

Week 31

I am in a much better state of mind these days, thank goodness. There has been no crying and much, much less freaking out. Hooray!

Got two Christmas presents in the mail from friends recently - a handmade story cookbook and Clinton Kelly's (from What Not to Wear) book, Freakin' Fabulous. I'm excited to sit down and read them both, and was so thrilled to get unexpected presents in the mail - one from Bolton, England! Both were really nice surprises that made my day.

Mr. Fantastic and I got most of our Christmas shopping done and wrapped over the weekend, so not only is our tree all festive and happy looking, I am breathing a sigh of relief that we've got that off our plates. And, even more exciting, we got an offer on our condo! If all goes well, we could be out and into a new place by the middle of January and I can stop worrying about my poor Little Tiny Naked Baby sleeping in a drawer. (Which, truly, I am not doing so much anymore. I'm still itching to nest but I feel much less antsy about things right now.)

We had lunch with our friends Erin and Matt and their two baby girls today. It was lovely to see them, and Erin has promised to go with me this week to complete my baby registry and help me make sure I register for what I need and skip all the crap I don't. As a mother of a newborn and a less-than-two year old, she should know. She also wisely suggested that I finish registering before Christmas in case anyone wants to get us baby stuff. (In fact, every time anyone has asked Mr. F what he wants for Christmas, he says "Baby stuff!" so it's prolly a good idea.)

My cousins have planned my baby shower for January 24 and I am very much looking forward to it. Should we happen to still be living in the condo by then, we're going to call a halt to the whole moving house proceedings until after Peanut arrives so that we can set up and make a place for the baby and figure out what to do with all the baby things I'll hopefully be receiving at the shower. As a bonus, my brother has said if we run out of room, we can keep anything we need to at his place, which eases my mind a bit as well.

Ooh, and I'm going to be an (honorary) Aunt again soon! My cousin H3 is due on Christmas Eve but it looks like she'll probably be having her baby sometime this week. I can't believe it's already her time, and it makes it seem like Peanut's arrival is even more imminent. I can't wait to meet her little boy and see her become a mama.

And finally, in Official News of the Peanut: Had an OB visit this morning. It went well. I am measuring 30 cm, which is right on target. And I have been self-checking my glucose four times a day for almost a week now, with excellent results. Only two of the readings were high an hour after eating, both times after fast food, and both of which had returned to well below the threshold after two hours. Dr. O was pleased with the testing and sees no need for me to go on any medication or to do any further follow up with the gestational diabetes specialist.

The downside is that she wants me to continue the self-checks four times a day for the next two weeks because even though the majority of my tests were fine, sugar levels can only get worse as pregnancy and pregnancy hormones progress. It's like she just can't truly believe that I don't have or won't get gestational diabetes all because of the high score on the glucose test, regardless of the fact that it's biased against me AND routinely has a 60-70% false positive rate. But I can hack two more weeks of self checks. I can handle two more months of self checks if that's what it takes.

She also wants another growth ultrasound in two weeks, just to keep an eye on the baby's size. Which, yay, we get to see the baby again, but boo, because I really don't think it's necessary since I'm measuring on track and my glucose is fine. However, when I go back in two weeks, Dr. O will be on vacation, so perhaps I can sweet talk this Dr. Guggenheim I will be seeing (and by proxy Dr. O) into not worrying about all this so much. Much as the pricking my finger for the self-check doesn't really hurt, I'm already sick of doing it four times a day. I know that all of this hoopla is mostly a CYA for the doc but it's a giant PITA for me.

Oh, and she wants me to get a flu shot, even though I never get one because I seem to end up getting sick when I get them but I never get the flu when I don't get one. Weird, I know, but it was the same way with my mom. Anyway, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to give it a try this year, because should I happen to get the flu, I will be a million times more miserable being flu-ridden and pregnant.

Otherwise, I feel pretty good except for my continued lament of feeling HUGE. I am actually sleeping pretty well - have figured out a good configuration of my nine million pillows and my brain has quieted down at night. Peanut seems to have taken up residence completely on the right side of my belly - I am visibly lopsided and very solid on the right side, while the left seems practically hollow. We are apparently not worried about this right now, although it's not the best position for delivery. Plenty of time for him to get situated better in the next 69 days, according to Dr. O.

Meanwhile, Peanut is not pulling any punches in making himself completely comfortable. As he gets bigger, the movements I feel are less kicks and punches and more wiggling and squirming, which seriously gives my lopsided belly the appearance of an alien trying to escape when he starts shuffling around in there. Every day makes it more and more real that it's a Little Tiny Naked Person making himself at home in my belly. And every day Mr. F and I talk to him more and fall more in love with him and look more and more forward to the day we get to meet him.

In other news, it was below 0 all day today and ridiculously cold last night. Still below 0 right now, so I am thanking goodness for our heated mattress pad, because it gets cold in our bedroom at night, even if we run the heater. Brr! I wish my long underwear fit over my belly because I would be wearing both pairs right now if I could. But at least it feels like Christmas time with the sparkly snow and freezing weather and my happy little tree full of gifts.

Straight No Chaser - The 12 Days of Christmas

Mr. Fantastic and I heard this song on the radio today and it cracked us up.

Straight No Chaser - The 12 Days of Christmas

Television blahs

I find myself increasingly bored with all my t.v. shows lately. Heroes, Sarah Connor Chronicles, Eli Stone - I'm done with. Totally over. I don't know how it happened but Heroes became a total snoozefest that I put on in the background while I do the dishes. I figure I'll finish out the seasons on all of them, but those are three series recordings I'll be canceling. Even Chuck is somehow failing to hold my attention. I still madly love Pushing Daisies, but of course that means they've canceled it.

That said, how is it that Grey's Anatomy is finally making me enjoy it again? Oh, that's right...by making Izzy crazy and bringing back her hot dead fiancee. Mmm, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, how I love you. Also, adding in Kevin McKidd didn't hurt at all.

House, Life and The Mentalist are still entertaining me, at least. And I still love my Stargate Atlantis, but it's bittersweet because every episode brings us closer to the end. The good part about this is that means the writers can finally stop screwing up the show. (Brain Storm, I'm looking at you.)

I even went so far as to watch the first eight or so eps of Merlin and failed to be captivated like the rest of my flist has been. Sigh. Thank goodness for books. I will happily take your recs for new shows to try watching (and where I can find them) or books to read.

Peanut: It's getting harder (81 days to go!)

Week 29

I have finally succumbed to the baby hormones. The last two weeks I have started getting alternately freaked out, depressed, stressed, etc. about numerous things. The thing with the gestational diabetes started me off and now I am worrying about everything. There has been crying. And also sometimes maniacal laughter.

Some of the things on my mind:

~ Gestational diabetes. I got a 183 on the glucose test and a 69 on the regular fasting test. They are looking for something from 70-130. So even though my regular test was fine and the glucose test is basically biased against me because of my bypass, my doctor is convinced I have GD anyway. She was ready to have me start seeing a diabetes specialist and maybe put me on insulin and everything.

I’m pretty sure I don’t have it, so we discussed it some more and the doc is going to let me test my blood sugar at home for a week before we do anything more drastic. I had to go this week and pick up the meter and testing strips and everything. So hopefully I will test fine for a week and we can forget about it. (And! The glucose testing stuff - lancets, test strips and meter - would have cost me several HUNDRED dollars if my health insurance hadn't picked up the entire tab for me. Shocking that they want over $113 for a box of 100 test strips. Yikes!)

~ I am a giant whale. No, seriously. I feel like one and here is photographic evidence. Even though my doctor keeps telling me the baby is not a giant mutant, I feel like he is. My belly is getting bigger by the minute and Peanut is getting stronger every day. Which means he is giving me some serious wallops while he does his calisthenics in there. I've taken to saying URK and clutching my side when he whacks me a good one, which freaks Mr. Fantastic out to no end, so I've got to stop doing it. Exciting discovery this week: I can't get out of the car on my own. I'm learning how to do it without help, but in the mean time Mr. F has to help hoist. It makes a girl feel like such a delicate, glowing flower.

Sleeping is getting harder, too. If my brain wasn't already going a million miles an hour, I don't think I'd be able to sleep anyway because it's so hard to get comfortable. My nine million pillows are not helping, at least until I can figure out a new configuration. I may need to invest in some flying buttresses. By the way, the neice and nephew are now calling Peanut "Turkey" and doubtless it will be something like "Bowl Full of Jelly" come Christmas.

Thank goodness for Mr. F. He's been a spectacular help by providing back and belly rubs on demand. It is unbelievable how achy my sides and belly are now that they're doing some serious stretching, not to mention the low back aches from carrying around this bowling ball. I shudder to think what it's going to feel like in three months.

So I am having these fun feelings of OMG I'M ALREADY HUGE AND I'VE GOT THREE MORE MONTHS IN WHICH I AM ONLY GOING TO GET BIGGER, seeing as Our Peanut is supposed to double or possibly triple in size between now and the end. Gack.

~ ALSO. Moving. This is the big one. I cannot anti-recommend enough deciding to move house while you are pregnant. It's killing me. I am ready to start nesting and getting ready for the baby and I can't. It may be that we end up not selling our place and actually stay in the condo for a while after the baby's born. Or we might end up selling and getting a new place before then. What this boils down to is, we can't buy anything for the baby or move in the furniture from Mr. Fantastic's cousin because we have no place to put it. At some point, we are going to have to jump ship and make a decision that we're staying put until after the baby's born, and then we'll be able to stop keeping our condo showplace-ready for buyers all the time and start setting up for Peanut. The question is, when do we do that? January? February? I don't know how long we should give it but I don't want to wait until the last minute. Not knowing if we're staying or going is really getting the best of me.

So I am also having these super-fun feelings of OMG THERE'S GOING TO BE A BABY IN 12 WEEKS AND HE WILL HAVE TO GO NAKED AND SLEEP IN A DRAWER because we as yet have nothing for him to wear, play with or sleep in. I am certain this will all be rectified sometime in the next three months. I know that for centuries, babies actually did sleep in drawers and go naked and were birthed in fields and people were fine without having everything all sorted ahead of time. I AM NOT THOSE PEOPLE. So for now, my super-organized planner brain is quietly freaking the frak out.

Otherwise, I am mostly good, except for the parts where I'm not. I'm sure it will get better. Until then, so it goes.

You can't be a dentist! You're an elf. Elves make toys.

Or, me, Dad, Steve and Mr. Fantastic (twice!) as disco elves.

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Only 93 days to go!

Week 27

Had a routine baby visit with Dr. Owens yesterday. All was basically fine, except for the unmitigated disaster of the glucose test, which I will tell you more about in a minute.

As far as Peanut goes, still going strong and growing like a weed. I'm still measuring 3 cm big, and according to last week's size ultrasound, that puts him in the 69th percentile. Dr. O says she's not worried unless he gets into the 90s. She also asked about movement and I told her he continues to be a lunatic rock star, rolling around in there. I asked if there was such a thing as too much activity. "Nope!" Dr. O told me cheerfully, "An Active Baby is a Happy Baby!" So apparently Disney's bought stock in my womb because if fetal activity is any indication, that joint is the Happiest Place On EarthTM.

This week Peanut's hearing is developing further, and so we are supposed to practice talking and singing to him because he'll recognize our voices. I just realized that I don't really know any lullabies, so either I learn some or Peanut will just have to start liking U2. Also, last week his eyes started opening and so the book says we may want to try shining a flashlight at my belly to see if he'll respond. I'm sure Mr. F will still not let me do it because "it's mean!" Maybe I'll secretly try when he's not around. *snerk*

I'm feeling good, except that I'm starting to feel more awkward all the time with this basketball in my belly. I've gained some weight - I'm up to 5 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight. Luckily, I haven't experienced any of the swelling of hands or feet yet - thankfully my wedding ring still feels the same. Mostly I'm just starting to get tired all the time again and I have some low back pain, which Mr. F is excellent for helping with. My belly button is starting to flatten out. Still an innie - it was always a very deep innie before - but not nearly as deep. It seems I've got a little crop of freckles in there that I've never seen until now.

So, the glucose test. Complete disaster. It’s routine for all pregnant women around this time to check for gestational diabetes. They give you this super concentrated glucose drink – 50 grams of sugar in like 3 ounces of orange flavored kool-aid stuff, and then check your blood an hour later to see how you’ve reacted. Depending on how you do, they either say you’re fine or they have you come back to do a more advanced 4 hour test. Everyone says how awful tasting the stuff is, but it didn't taste that bad. It reminded me of a really intense orange drink from McDonald's.

Anyway, I drank the stuff and literally 5 minutes later I was ridiculously sick. Pouring buckets of sweat, dizzy, seeing spots, throwing up – it was awful. With my surgery, I have to be careful about how much sugar I have at any one time or it causes this reaction. But since I’m able to handle sweets like cookies or candy or whatever, it didn’t even occur to me that this might be too much all at once. Dr. O felt bad and said she should’ve realized that it might be too much for me too.

So basically, I felt seriously crappy and had to lay down in the Dr.'s office for an hour. They took my blood anyway but didn’t think the test would be valid since I barfed up the stuff. So now I have to go in on Monday morning to do a fasting test and hopefully they’ll be able to get a good result from that. I eat pretty well and I feel fine, so I'm really not concerned that I might have GD - if anything, my blood sugar tends to run low unless I eat on a regular schedule.

Next visit in two more weeks...I can tell this every two weeks thing is going to get old fast. Not looking forward to when I have to start going in every week!

Dad update

So I spent all of Monday and Tuesday in court for my dad's DUI trial. Ugh. While it started out interesting, it quickly got boring and repetitive and totally wiped me out by the end of each day, even though I was just sittng there in a freezing court room. I can't imagine it was any easier for Dad. Especially to have a night he'd rather forget dragged out and discussed in minute detail for two days.

The jury selection process was the most interesting part. The witness examination started out interesting but turned tedious when both attorneys asked the same questions over and over again, just in different ways. It also made me realize that I don't have enough patience to be a lawyer. You have to ferret out the tiniest details and ask the right questions in the right order and lay a foundation for the next set of questions. You have to spell everything out in detail because you can't rely on the jury being smart enough to come to the conclusion you want. You can't skip a step and it takes FOREVER to get from point A to point B.

Unfortunately, he was found guilty, which was what we expected, but the reason he went to trial is because the plea bargains they kept offering him weren't any good. Now we're hoping when it comes to sentencing at the end of January, my dad's time in rehab and three weekly AA meetings since May will help in making his sentence lighter.

On Monday, he was 175 days sober and that should hopefully make a good impression with the judge. I have seen on several websites that in Colorado, the penalty for a DUI with a previous DUI in the last 5 years is a fine of $500-$1,500, 60-120 hours of community service and jail time of 90 days to a year, with a minimum 10 days mandatory. So I am steeling myself (and trying to prepare Dad as well) that he'll have to at least spend ten days in jail because I don't think there's anything the judge can do about that no matter what kind of good impression he makes.

We're just glad it's over now and although it's nice to have another couple of months break before he's sentenced, we'd also kind of like to just be done with it and find out what's going to happen to him. We still haven't got the results of his MRI from last week and so that combined with his uncertain legal future, it's been a stressful time for all of us, but especially Dad. I'm sure worrying about the trial and now worrying about the sentencing are not helpful at all for his physical or mental health.

So that's the news on Dad, which is unfortunately, not really any news right now. Will update again when we get the MRI results and know what he's going to do about treatment.

Good things!

~ Okay, so good news for Dad - he was able to find a place to do the MRI for only $800. Much better than the $3k we started at. We do that on Wednesday and will have to decide on a treatment plan once the doc gets the results.

~ Our realtor called yesterday afternoon and said someone wants to make a cash offer on our place and schedule the closing on December 19. We don't know the amount yet, but it's encouraging to already have somebody interested enough to put in an offer. Scary though - with the prospect of an offer today, it just sort of dawned on me that part of the whole selling our home and buying a new one also involves me having to actually leave this place that I love so much. Just have to keep reminding myself that it's all for a good cause, and that despite how much I love our condo, I have been dying for more space for years. So exciting to think about a new place and the baby's room and making a new home!

~ As for me and Peanut and Mr. Fantastic, we all went and had the ultrasound yesterday. It seems I am carrying a GIANT MUTANT ALIEN BABY. But that's only if you ask me. If you ask the Susie the Ultrasound Lady, she will tell you that despite Peanut weighing 2.1 POUNDS right now, he is less than two weeks ahead sizewise and therefore we all have nothing to worry about. She also mentioned again about how active he is and speculated that he must really be thumping me good. (She's right!) He's also moved himself back to breech. He's sitting sort of in a V shape, folded in half with his butt at the bottom, his head to my left and his feet to my right.

Mr. F's favorite part, like mine, was seeing the baby move, but more specifically, seeing the heartbeat. It's so amazing and something you can't get from seeing the pictures. I'm so glad Mr. F was able to be there for it.

Susie the Ultrasound Lady took lots of pictures again, incliuding a couple of the 3D ones, which are almost less cute than the regular pics because the baby looks sort of lumpy and weird. But still pretty cute! And she measured my fluid levels, which were fine and she told us how long he was but now I've forgotten. Book says average is 1.5 pounds and 13.5 inches, or roughly the size of your average rutabaga. Not that any of us have actually ever seen a rutabega in our lives, but whatever. So, at 33 ounces Peanut is bigger than a Big Gulp! Also, bigger than an American football, which is about 11 inches long and weighs about 15 ounces. It's hard for me to wrap my head around that!

Speaking of size, we saw our neice and nephew on Halloween. I was chatting with Patrick, who is 7, and he said to me, "So, what are you going to call him now? He's way too big to be a Peanut anymore!" I laughed and suggested maybe we call him Pumpkin instead. And then this weekend, the whole Fantastic clan got together for a big dinner, and when Patrick saw me, he came over and put his face right by my tummy and said, "Hi, Pumpkin!" So cute.

It's SuperPeanut!

Week 25

Saw the Dr. on Wednesday. No news except I'm measuring 3 cm big, so I'm scheduled for a growth ultrasound on Monday, just to check the baby's size. On the one hand, I'm glad because I always want another chance to see the baby, plus since Mr. Fantastic had to miss the last one in October, this means he gets a chance to see the baby again too.

But on the other hand, I'm concerned about being labeled with a "big" baby. A lot of times that means your doctors will pressure you into inducing earlier than 40 weeks and I really want to avoid induction if at all possible. I'm not going for natural childbirth, i.e. drug-free, or anything, but I don't like what the dugs they use to induce do.

This could be concern over nothing - there's a lot of reasons for me to measure big that don't actually mean a big baby. Could be just how the baby is positioned inside or some extra belly fat on my part, etc. However, at the scan a month ago, the tech did say the baby was about 14.5 oz, which is larger than the 10.5-12 that's average. It may end up in another month that we're right on target and there's nothing to worry about, so we'll really just have to wait and see as we get closer.

I'm interested to see how big they say Peanut is now, because he certainly feels huge. And active - he's moving around like crazy these days. It's distracting, especially when I'm trying to go to sleep. It's not hurting or anything, but I do have to keep giving him a stern talking-to about letting Mommy sleep or work.

Also at the appointment this week the doc said I have to have my glucose test this month, and now that I'm in the third trimester, she wants to see me every two weeks instead of once a month. That part was surprising - I didn't think they would need to start seeing me more often until later.

My book tells me I should be gaining a pound a week now. I am doing my best - can't believe how hungry I am, all the time. I am now 3.5 pounds up from my pre-pregnancy weight but I don't see me gaining a pound a week yet. It's hard for me to eat very much at one time, what with my stomach being so small and the baby taking up so much room. So I'll eat and then an hour later, need to eat again.

I've had quite a few blood-sugar related incidents lately, just like what used to happen after my surgery before I'd figured out my new way of eating. Basically now, when I don't keep on top of eating, my blood sugar will drop pretty quickly and I'll get sweaty, dizzy and start having tunnel vision and in general just feel crappy until I can get some protein and some sugar into my system. I carry peanut M&M's with me most of the time in case of this happening because the combination of the chocolate and peanuts seems to keep me from crashing too hard until I can eat actual food.

Anyway, all that to say, I think I'm going to have to pick back up with my eating plan - at least set my alarms again to remind me when to eat and start having my protein shake for breakfast again. Kind of a bummer, because I really was enjoying my zen-like eat-what-I-want-when-I-want plan, but I'm just not keeping up with how fast Peanut is growing.

Otherwise, I still feel pretty great. Sleeping is still only mildly uncomfortable, however a lot of times I wake up tired. I don't think I'm sleeping as soundly as I could be but in general, all is well.